The blog of a person....yeah that sounds good.

Saturday, September 11, 2010

How to Draw a Catfish

Before you pervs get any ideas, this post is not about OILY ASS. However, for all you catfish fanatics out there, this is for you. Now, they key to drawing any catfish or catfish-like creature is starting with its gaping mouth that is uses to suck immense amounts of shit into. Draw it like this:

Well, I hope you could handle that, at least. Now the second part gets tricky. Here is where you must draw the catfish's large and horrible eyes, which it uses to locate its food items - usually made or shat or other detritus. Like so:

Now to add its pupils. This is key, because how would the catfish locate its food, which is made of shat, without inlets to its horrible catfish retinas? Draw like so:

Now, this next part is by far the most important. The catfish must locate its food using only its whiskers. Yes, my friends, they are also made of shat. You see, the catfishes ate shat for so long that their other senses became dull and...well..full of shat, so this is the only sense they have left to SUSTAIN THEM. Draw this carefully, like so:

Boring part next. The catfish needs a bellysac to house its internal organs, draw this poorly, like so:

The catfish now needs fins to move to the plave where it will consume its food which tastes of shat. Draw the fins like this:

Ok, this next part is crucial. Your catfish must be eating food. All catfish, at all times, are eating food. "Wait, this food tastes of shat or is shat, why would they want to eat it?" you may ask. Well, my friend, don't question the ways of the catfish, for they are fat, fat, disgusting creatures. Draw the shat food like so:

This next and final part may be considered an accessory. If you choose not to include it, I don't blame you. However, I am a avid supporter of catfish literacy and am very turned on, and pleasured, by the sight of a catfish reading a good book. So, due to this, my catfish is reading an interesting novel titled "Why, why do I find shat with my whiskers and then consume it?" May you gain much wisdom from this catfish, yet still revel in your bed of shat.


- Mike

4 comments:

J said...

Holy shit catfish are the hardest things to draw thank you mike

MrScriblam said...

god bless this mess

Pinao said...

This is glorious.

Anonymous said...

troooooooooooooooooogdoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooor!